30+ Clever (Yet Savory) Insults for Fiery Folks Still Trying to Keep it G-Rated

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  • 01
    r/AskReddit. Posted by u/Mandalay-dreaming 20 hours ago What is your favorite insult that doesn't involve curse words?
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    Relative_Scale_3667 22 hr. ago I'm genuinely jealous of someone who hasn't met you. Reply Share 1.2k Bumblemeister 15 hr. ago I desire that we might be better strangers.
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    nikk796 19 hr. ago As an outsider, what's your opinion on intelligence? 1.3k Reply Share CanusMaeror 16 hr. ago Love this one
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    Fair-Discussion 9010 19 hr. ago You look easy to draw 2.0k Reply Share panicattherestaurant - 17 hr. ago Also, "you look like something I'd draw with my left hand"
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    mykittenfarts 19 hr. ago You have delusions of adequacy. 974 Reply Share ILove Beer SoMuch 17 hr. ago i see that you have a tenuous grasp on the english language, in general
  • 06
    candi666 18 hr. ago "His elevator doesn't go all the way to the top." About peed laughing the first time I heard that one. 316 Reply Share throwawaytodaycat 15 hr. ago The lights are on but nobody's home.
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    Sam_anttics 13 hr. ago I've always liked: The wheel is still spinning, but the gerbil died a week ago.
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    Current-Tree770 15 hr. ago My mom likes "They're a few fries short of a Happy Meal" Reply Share 109 Addle Pated Badger 15 hr. ago A few roos loose in the top paddock.
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    DrunkAtBurgerKing 17 hr. ago Along the same lines, my dad used to tell certain employees that he would "promote them to customer" 3 ↓ Reply Share Relative_Scale_3667 16 hr. ago Lol similar: If I have to do it myself what do I need you for?
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    beepbeepboopbeep1977 Can you stop talking to me? People might think I'm your friend 23 10 hr. ago Reply Share Pokemonaddict40 8 hr. ago Ha that made me chuckle .
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    Ok-Conversation-7012 18 hr. ago Wisdom has been chasing you but you are a fast runner 745 .... Reply Share OBISerious 16 hr. ago That's because they're unencumbered by knowledge.
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    Royal-Carob 17 hr. ago "I can explain it to you but I can't understand it for you." Reply Share 475 queen11tb 16 hr. ago This is my favorite.
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    thinkpax 19 hr. ago Not exactly an insult, but "I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain this to you" is my favourite one.
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    Digital Arts_Wizard. 19 hr. ago You have the communicative ability of an alarm clock Reply Share 164 anonysheep 19 hr. ago specifically the chimp clanging it's cymbals at its best
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    Curious_Start2430 18 hr. ago Once had an English teacher who thundered "YOU BOY, ARE A SCOURGE ON THE BREATH OF HUMANITY"
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    Digital Arts_Wizard. 19 hr. ago You have a face for radio ↑ 775 ↓ Reply Share arent_you_hungry. 19 hr. ago You have a voice for silent film and a face for radio.
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    _ReDd1T_UsEr. 19 hr. ago "If you were the prize at the end of my race, I would walk backward." 633 Reply Share Armchair_Advocate 19 hr. ago moonwalks to the finish line
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    MurtZero1134. 19 hr. ago Uncultured swine - idk it's just fun to say 276 Reply Share Kermit1950 18 hr. ago Jeez! My brother just said that to me last week! (My nickname is Piglet so the joke suited, lol.) 39 Reply Share LeakyAssFire 14 hr. ago That'll do pig, that'll do.
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    Active-Strawberry-37 19 hr. ago I don't know what your problem is but I'm sure it's hard to pronounce. Reply Share 510 SmasherOfStorms. 17 hr. ago I like this one
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    jodkalemon 19 hr. ago If you were a spice, you'd be flour. 242 ↓ Reply Share VideoBrew 16 hr. ago Now that's just roux'd ↑ 183 ↓ Reply Share Shudderbug0 15 hr. ago Awww, you're just buttering me up!
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    legthief 19 hr. ago "Everyone who ever loved you was wrong." 444 Reply Share CryoWreck 19 hr. ago I have a buddy who will appreciate me hitting him with this one. Thanks stranger
  • 22
    bumpycampaign 19 hr. ago Your family tree must be a circle. 279 Reply Share No-Two79 18 hr. ago I always heard it, "Your family tree is a wreath."
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    Honest-as-can-be. 19 hr. ago I'll pay for your vasectomy 204 Reply Share SophieornotSophie. 17 hr. ago "Sometimes you need to chlorinate the gene pool"
  • 24
    Gonebabythoughts 20 hr. ago Bless your heart 433 Reply Share mansonsturtle 19 hr. ago Seconded. And can be used in various ways. So flexible!
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    Cole_the_Coleman 19 hr. ago Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elder berries! 339 Son_of_steven19 17 hr. ago Reply Share Now go away or I will taunt you a second time!
  • 26
    jollyrobyn 18 hr. ago Once had a guy tell me "you look like you'd be allergic to peanuts." I was not sure how to respond
  • 27
    Headstert 18 hr. ago Your last two brain cells are really fighting for third place, aren't they? 103 Current-Tree770 19 hr. ago Reply Share You just described my cat. His one brain cell just plays Pong around his skull.
  • 28
    ahamel13 18 hr. ago Woman: "If you were my husband, I'd poison your tea!" Churchill: "If I were your husband, I'd drink it."
  • 29
    "Your last two brain cells are fighting for third place, aren't they?"

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